Vegitarian Beef Stew
I am so frustrated with someone right now. As you know, I do a lot of volunteer work and have moved up the ladder a bit in some of my enterprises. I can’t tell you what’s happening because I’ve long ago learned that a public blog is. . . well. . .public. Anyone can read it, including the people you are bitching about.
Instead, I present you with an analogy so that you can feel my frustration. Trust me, the details are boring and meaningless. The analogy is much more fun.
Pretend, for a moment, that I’m a waitress in a vegetarian restaurant. A customer comes in, takes a seat, peruses the menu, and indicates she’s ready to order.
“Hi, I don’t see beef stew on the menu, but that’s what I’d like. I’ve been craving beef stew all day! And I want to take a big ol’ to-go container with me for all the ladies at the office. They were just telling me that they’ve never tried beef stew, so I want to teach them all about the wonders of beef stew!”
As a skilled, well-qualified waitress I handle the situation with ease. “Beef stew surely is yummy, but unfortunately we are a vegetarian restaurant. We have oodles and oodles of vegetarian soups and stews. Can I bring you a few samples? Here, try this lovely mushroom risotto, how about this quinoa and black bean chili? Yadda yadda yadda. I’ll let you think about it and be back for your order.”
While I’m off taking care of another table, the cook comes up with the manager in tow and says “Ummmm. Why is this lady coming into the kitchen, ordering beef stew for her whole office? Please handle her.”
So I go back to the customer and clearly explain and also send a text to the whole office of ladies expecting beef stew:
“Hello dear customer, I think there was some misunderstanding before. We don’t have beef stew. We have no meat. We are a vegetarian restaurant. If you’d like beef stew you can go on down the road to the House o’ Meat and they may have what you are looking for. Please let me know your decision.”
One office employee texts back “Whoa. Ok. Thanks for the info. We don’t need beef stew.”
But the lady, the customer in front of me, completely ignores my existence. She goes back to the cook and tells him “Ok, I’ve decided on my order. I’m having the beef stew. I’m anemic.”
At this point I’m out. The manager has stepped in.
By now you must be saying, “but Carrie, surely your analogy is too simplistic and can not reveal the depths of this problem. Surely there is a reason this woman thinks she can order beef stew at your vegetarian restaurant?”
No, truly. The analogy is pretty much exactly what is happening, involving a very simple rule that can not and will not be changed nor should it be changed. Yet the lady completely ignores us and believes she is going to get what she wants even though it won’t happen. There is no clearer way to tell her that it won’t happen. She doesn’t seem to understand the word no.
I wish the manager luck and am glad it is out of my hands. I wanted to crawl through my computer and grab the lady by the ear, asking her “is this thing on? Does your brain work? What’s your major malfunction?”