The Queen's Rambles

Happy Valentine’s Day! I got a super sweet Valentine from Erik. Of course, I sort of made it, but he directed me. He did do all the cutting and some of the writing. I forget how excited little kids can get about things. He’s been totally hopped up about Valentine’s all day, mainly because Ruby of Max and Ruby fame makes Valentines in one episode.

Really, we didn’t do much to celebrate. I flexed all my creative muscles and made a pancake heart. Then Erik made Valentine’s for all his Oregon relatives. He totally made me cry because he wanted to make his Granny (my grandma) a card. When I told him she died (he talks about that once in a while), he said that was ok. We could just put it outside and it would fly up to the sky and she would read it there. I really have no idea what to tell him about death and all that jazz. I guess if that’s what he wants to believe right now, that’s what I’ll let him believe. There’s plenty of time for him to come to his own conclusions about death, life, religion and all that jazz.

We spent a lot of time at Ikea, looking for the perfect dresser. We ended up with a giant six drawer chest, which will suit our needs perfectly, but dwarfs our other furniture. I’m just glad to have something that can be filled to the gills. I want to get the baby clothes put away, pronto! My friend brought me another garbage bag stuffed with clothes yesterday. I need to go through it and return what I don’t think we’ll use. She had a winter baby and we’re having a spring baby so I don’t think I am going to want a lot of the stuff that I’ve seen her daughter wear. It is all super cute, but wool knit leggings in July aren’t going to work.

I totally over did it at Ikea and really stretched out some of my innards. I put myself on bed rest for the rest of the afternoon/evening and am feeling a lot better. I was starting to get a little bit worried.

I subscribed to NetFlix a couple of weeks ago and am really liking the streaming video. I don’t care to watch movies on my laptop, but it is pretty nice when I need to be alone and laying down. Netflix to the rescue! I’ve already watched a couple of movies (Made of Honor–cheezy and Then She Found Me–pretty good). I don’t even know what movies I’ve missed in the past four years.

I have a question for all you moms. How independent do you expect your four year old to be? I expect Erik to get his own water when he is thirsty (cups are in a low cabinet, we have a water dispenser in the freezer door). I expect him to help me sort out the whites when we do laundry and empty the lint trap (if he is down there, he doesn’t always come down). I expect him to hand me his coat and gloves when we come in the house, not just throw them on the floor (he can’t reach the hooks). I expect him to put his dirty clothes in the hamper or the dirty clothes pile (he usually needs reminding, which is fine because I need reminding too). I expect him to take his dirty dishes into the kitchen and put them on the counter. I expect him to help me vacuum when he makes a mess (don’t expect him to do it well, but he has to make an effort). I expect him to go get his own easily accessible snack when he asks for it. I expect him to throw his own garbage away. If there is something of his that needs to be carried and it isn’t too heavy, I expect him to carry it. I expect him to get from point A to point B on his own. I do not carry him at all. Not that he would let me.

We haven’t had any problems with him doing those things. Sometimes he has to be reminded, but he rarely throws a fit about any of it. He enjoys his independence and really likes helping out. In fact, he has a whole list of other things he would really like to do that I consider too dangerous/messy (make his own pancakes, chop vegetables, do the whole laundry routine by himself).

I’ve been told I’m a little harsh with him. I don’t know. Sometimes I guess I do talk harsh to him, but if he is capable of doing those things, why not let him? I’m not going to be one of those ladies who serves my 40 year old pizza in the basement. When he’s old enough, I envision him getting an after school job and buying his own wants. I don’t know how well that will actually work. If it interferes with his grades I wouldn’t want him to do it. He might also be really involved in sports or other extracurriculars that are more important for his college admission so I can’t make any long reaching parenting decisions about something that won’t even be possible for 12 years.

I don’t mind be a hard ass, but I honestly don’t think I am. I think I’m too easy on him a lot of times. He still spends a lot of time on my lap being cuddled. It’s just interesting to see other people’s parenting styles.