The Queen's Rambles

You knew there would be drama with my mom here, right? It never ends. I think I would have a nervous breakdown if I had to live near my family and deal with all of this on a daily basis.

So you knew my mom would probably go home early. Yup. It is happening. She leaves tomorrow.

My sister’s husband is in New Jersey with his high school sweetheart. He can’t tolerate my sister any more and I don’t blame him, but how can he bail on his kids? Not a surprise, really, since he has abandoned kids scattered across the nation.

He’s been in close phone contact with my mom, trying to figure out what my sister is up to. It’s the usual, of course. Dope, men, blah blah blah. Apparently there is something called the purple pages on FB and he found my sister’s picture there. It is a prostitution ring or something. I’m not really clear on it. She also sent him a FB message that she wants him to take my oldest nephew because she’s tired of him and can’t handle him.

Anyway, my sister is in a new house that feeds into a fairly ritzy school. Half the students come from the super fancy country club houses and the other half come from the other side of the tracks. The principal is a young guy who is not burned out yet. My mom called and talked to him last week, so he showed up at my sister’s door with a police officer and took the kids to school. This is a GOOD thing. Finally someone is standing up and taking notice! The principal of their old school saw so much shit that he couldn’t possibly rescue all the kids. He gave up caring. I have semi-high hopes that this new principal is going to rattle some cages.

Today CPS was out there with a different case worker. The kids were alone with a registered sex offender, so they were taken into protective custody. My mom was freaking out, but I was trying to convince her this was a GOOD thing. She would know they were safe tonight. I know foster care is not ideal, but their life is far from safe. A couple of night’s of foster care would be better than what they are living right now. The story my mom pieced together is that their sex offender babysitter was in trouble for being a true pedo. So disgusting.

CPS told the father that if a family member was able to pick the kids up by 5 pm they could go with the family member, but the person would have to pass a UA.

Guess where the kids are right now?

With my #*#*$(#(#@*# sister. She refused to take the UA but they gave her the kids anyway.

The case will be open for 30 days and there will be some kind of investigation. I hope this case worker is more on the ball than the other case worker. They want proof of everything, but it’s not like my sister is going out in middle of the street, shooting up (do you shoot up meth?) in front of a police officer. At some point doesn’t someone have to listen to the people who are making the reports? I am not exaggerating one little bit when I say that I am afraid my sister is going to kill one of the kids. Oregon CPS will say “oh, darn. Guess they were right.” I want to go to their office and kick in their walls and force them to listen.

My mom has a plane ticket home for tomorrow evening. Once again she is disappointing my kids. I get that she needs to go there. I WANT her to go home and take care of the kids. That’s all I’ve wanted. I just wish she would learn to shut her mouth and not tell my kids about her plans. First she told them she was moving here, so Erik is really sad that she’s not. Then she told them she would be here until after Elsa’s birthday party, but of course that didn’t work out either. I told her and told her when she first planned this trip to not tell my kids anything about her plans, but she refused to admit that her plans would change. That’s the part that pisses me off. Just bleepity-bleep LISTEN to me once in a while!

At least she finally said she was nuts to think she could move away from the kids. I was so angry about her moving plans. I know and understand that they are not her responsibility, but she’s all they’ve got. She’s their grandma. She needs to protect them the best she can. She took on that role when they were born and even though it is not fair, she needs to live up to that role. She finally said she couldn’t stand to be away from them and she didn’t know what she was thinking when she thought she could walk away.

It’s just so sad and there’s nothing I can do about it. I have had some serious talks with my mom, telling her to stop fantasizing about beating sense into my sister and start looking for real solutions. She must stop throwing all her money at my sister, thinking it will fix her. She must hire a lawyer and take care of business the way a normal person takes care of business. I don’t know if any of it got through to her, but she did perk up when I told her to call her friend’s granddaughter-in-law who actually works for CPS. I’ve talked to this lady and she told me she would LOVE to give my mom advice, but ethically (maybe legally?) she can’t do it unless my mom initiates the conversation.

It is so frustrating to watch the system completely fail my niece and nephews. It is even more frustrating to watch my mom make bad choice, after bad choice. She’s a really good woman, but she doesn’t understand how to make things happen. I really don’t understand her thought processes at all. You’d think a person in their 60s would have learned a little about the way the world works, but she keeps banging her head against the wall and only ends up with a headache.