Stuff and Things
*Did I ever tell you about Gwynnie Bee, the Netflix of clothing (sizes 10-26)? I got a trial subscription and it was really fun to get new clothes in the mail. Unfortunately very few items are appropriate for the life of a stay-at-home mom who spends hours on a playground so I cancelled my account. If I ever go back to work I would sign up. It’s really fun to get clothes without commitment. Too bad they were all cleavage baring.
*We had a really great playdate today! I am not really a fan of Elsa’s playgroup, but today only half the people showed up and we all clicked really well. We had a late lunch at Chick-Fil-A (I know, I know, I don’t go there, but I did today) and were the only people with kids in the play area. We let our four munchkins run and play for two hours while we sat outside the play area and talked. It was kind of amazing. I need more playdates like that.
*Elsa had her 3 year appointment yesterday. She is 37 inches tall and weighs 37 pounds. Though her BMI is high, the doctor was not at all concerned about her weight. She says she looks exactly like a 3 year old should–chubby with a little belly. I told her my plan and she agreed it sounded like a good one, but suggested I give her some protein every two hours to help with hunger pangs. She says she is not a fan of strict scheduling because children know when they are hungry and their hunger cues should be respected, but that it sounds like Elsa is getting into boredom eating.
*Elsa is completely in love with her little friend, Connor. It’s almost disturbing. She wants to wear red clothes because his favorite color is red. They cry for each other all the time. They both constantly pretend to talk on the phone to each other. If there is an event that one of the kids attends and the other doesn’t attend, the kid will not participate and will cry and cry for the other one. But then we get them together and they basically ignore each other. Kids are weird.
*I can’t find my ipod charger so I can’t go to the gym (unless I go to a class). I just ordered a new one so I hope I get it by Friday. I tried to put my music on my phone but even though I followed directions it doesn’t seem to be working. It’s making me grumpy. I don’t know how much data usage it would take to stream music on the phone, but maybe I can do that tomorrow. Isn’t the digital world supposed to be easier than this?
*I can’t quit watching the news out of Cleveland. I was enjoying Charles Ramsey’s interviews because he tells a great story, but I am not impressed that people are autotuning him and making him a joke. Yes, he is obviously not the most educated man around, but he is a hero. He deserves some respect, not being turned into a clown. I saw him on a news show earlier today and the poor guy looks completely haggard and beat down. He’s off his adrenaline high and exhausted after the whirlwind of everything that has happened. I hope people leave the poor man alone. I know we want to celebrate what he did–it is always nice to have a hero with some natural charisma, but some of the things I’m hearing are veering off from admiration into a very uncomfortable racial voyeurism.
*I’m officially the PTA Vice-President starting on July 1. It makes me extremely nervous because the new president has only been two meetings and knows NOTHING about education or the way the school system works. We sat down with the two former presidents and they were giving her a lot of advice while I listened in. She was so naive and . . well. . rude. She basically said she’d heard really bad things about our school and she was going to clean it up. Really what people who have been working their butts off for years want to hear, right? I don’t see this ending well. I don’t know what scares me more–working with her as her VP or having her bail, leaving me holding the bag.
*My mom is trying to guilt me into visiting or moving back to K Falls. I thought we were past this (especially the moving back part! Why would I want to move away from a place that has been named top 24 small city to live in and go back to that hell hole????), but apparently not. It used to work on me. She’d mention how she’d like to see the cousins grow up together, how much she missed us, yadda yadda yadda. I’d start thinking about it and three weeks later I’d have tickets to take Erik and myself out to the crazies. I thought I was doing it for him–keeping him with family. I didn’t realize I was teaching him to trust people who are not trustworthy. I was not keeping him safe. If I wasn’t related to those people there is no way in hell I ever would allow my children in the same room with them (except my mom–she’s just an enabler, not an addict).
I’m completely over that now. I’ve had a total mental shift and there is no guilt left. What kind of mother takes her children into a disaster like that? There’s the potential for drugs and violence. Everything is completely unpredictable. I’m miserable. Heck, I don’t like to eat off the plates or eat the food b/c basic food safety is not followed. My mom thinks that she can leave food sitting out in the winter because it’s cold outside. Dude! She has indoor heating. The kitchen counter is not a refrigerator. I don’t want to eat cooked meat that’s been sitting out all night.
It has been so freeing these past 18 months to let go of all the familial guilt. I don’t owe my mom anything. I do love my mom, but I can recognize that she has made some terrible mistakes and continues to make these mistakes. Nothing ever changes. I can not help her. She needs to help herself. She doesn’t even recognize that she has a problem. Instead of hopping on the computer and arranging a miserable trip, I’m pissed she thinks she can pull her woe is me crap and get us there. Maybe I shouldn’t get so angry, but she doesn’t get it. She refuses to see how messed up my sister is, always giving excuse after excuse for her shitty behavior. I can’t take listening to it anymore. I am out of sympathy. There comes a time in ever person’s life when they have to take control and make changes happen for themselves. She is well past that time and I’m tired of waiting for it to happen.
*Ok, I have to think of something pleasant to write about so I don’t go to bed and stew! How about cheap allergy meds? I’ve never taken allergy meds before because Benedryl knocks me on my ass, but I took a chance on some Costco brand non-drowsy claritan. What a great investment! I’ve never known that life can be so pleasant! I can walk outside without having my nose drip, my eyes prickle and my throat close-up. Yes, I’m almost a 40 year old woman and I didn’t know about the joys of allergy medication. I never thought my allergies were that bad, but I guess they were. I haven’t noticed any side effects, so I’d say that’s the best $18 I’ve spent in a long time.