The Queen's Rambles

I am firmly in the Tuesdays suck camp started by Pigs. Today has sucked immensely.

It all started at about 4 am when I was startled out of a sound sleep by the smell of smoke. The roof was on fire! Only it wasn’t! It was all a horrible dream. I was wide awake and totally paranoid that our neighbors chimney was somehow going to set our house on fire (they use wood heat). I had to come up with all sorts of plans on how to get out of the house, even though we already have plans. I realized that if the roof was on fire, I would probably be able to go down the stairs instead of out the emergency ladder, so at least I would be able to grab some shoes, my laptop and my big ass picture of Erik.

Then I was thinking about how we would have to go knock on doors all down our row and how hard it would be to wake every one up.

I have serious problems at 4 am.

I never really went back to sleep after that, which does not set the mood for a wonderful day.

We met our MOMS Club at the local library playroom for an hour. Erik was in a really weird mood and I was so embarrassed. We have a new member with a 3 yo girl and a toddler boy. We’ve seen them a couple of times and I really like the lady. Her daughter has been pretty shy in the past and was shy once again today. Erik comes up to me and starts telling me he doesn’t want any new friends, he doesn’t like the girl, he’s not going to talk to her, on and on. So rude!

I was completely stymied.

I’m glad the lady didn’t really know us so she could have attributed the behavior to a normal shy kid kind of behavior. I guess maybe some kids are shy like that? I don’t know. I have no experience in that area since Erik usually walks up to everyone he meets and introduces himself, asks what their names are and announces they are new best friends.

Luckily they both warmed up and ended up playing together for almost the whole hour, but it was still embarrassing at first.

When we got home, Erik continued to be a little pill. He decided there was only one thing he wanted to do this afternoon: jump out my bedroom window and land in the snow. Who wouldn’t want to jump out the second story window and land in a large pile of fluff? Except the pile of fluff is now mainly a pile of rock hard ice and isn’t even all that deep any more. If he really wanted to try it, he should have done it right after the blizzard, not two weeks later. Not that I would have let him do it then, but at least probably wouldn’t have broken any bones.

I’m just very thankful that our windows are a real bitch to open. I really do not need to be worrying about my lunatic son jumping out the window.

I see a lot of posts on Facebook about the Olympics: “Who would ever think to strap poles to their feet and go flying down a mountain?” Or “Who would ever think to lay down on a scrap of wood and go down a sheet of ice?”

I don’t remember who all was making comments like those, but I know I’ve seen it several times. Obviously they are not mothers of boys. Boys are crazy. I know there are crazy daredevil girls too, but I don’t know anything about that. I just know my boy would love to strap himself to a piece of wood and try flying down an icy embankment.

I did manage to make up a couple of new games that kept him entertained for a little while. The first game was a particular stroke of genius. It’s called “Can you find what Mommy is thinking about?” It was only good for about five minutes, but what a glorious five minutes. I told him I was thinking about something upstairs and he just had to find it. Then I laid in bed and rested while he brought me all kinds of random stuff. He had to put away each “loser” item before trying the next item. He thought it was great fun, though he did grow bored after about five minutes. I’ll take what I can get. He’s been so clingy and needy lately that any five minutes that he’s not on me petting my hair and trying to lick my face is five minutes of happiness.

The other game was actually a lot more interesting to him. He LOVES maps. We draw maps. We talk about maps. When we drive I always have to narrate what street we are on, which lane we’re in and what direction we are going to turn. He has never shown much interest in his Magnadoodle, but he found a little magnet today and was trying to figure out what was metal. There wasn’t much in the basement, but I spied the Magnadoodle and showed him how he could use the little magnet to draw. The little magnet was the perfect size to draw a map–various roads and places. Then he was able to take the pen and use it to draw his route to different places. He spent a good 45 minutes working on his maps and routes and talking to the people inside the Magnadoodle about where they were going. I’m glad to finally get some use out of that thing since he’s not into regular drawing.

I guess none of that sounds so bad, but did I mention the clinging and the defiance? I found myself yelling at him way too much today, finally ending with at “DO YOU LIKE TO BE YELLED AT????” The answer, of course, was yes. “It’s funny.” I guess it must be since the only way I can get him to move his ass and find his clothes, shoes and socks is to scream. I hate screaming. There has to be a better way. I sometimes count, but that doesn’t work so well because then he gets put in time out and that defeats the purpose. I want him to get dressed so we can leave the house. TIme out is just another time suck.

And yes, we do get dressed first thing in the morning. It’s just that by the time we leave the house an hour or two later all his clothes are off and scattered around the house. I am constantly on him to put his clothes on and he does, but as soon as I leave the room they are off again.

Can I duct tape his clothes on him?

At least we had his gym class this afternoon. We both needed to get out of here.

I went to the gym on Friday and actually felt a lot better after some time on the elliptical. I decided that the way it stretched my legs was actually good for my ligaments, so was looking forward to tonight.

Guess I was wrong.

It just kept getting more and more painful and finally at the 13 minute mark I had to give up because the pain was so intense. Bah! I need cardio!

I spent the rest of the time doing some machines for my arms and back. At least that’s something, but I am not happy to give up cardio already. I have seven weeks to go, then six weeks of recovery. Thirteen weeks! No! I am getting flabbier and flabbier every day! I know that is totally normal and to be expected since I’m pregnant. That’s what happens to pregnant ladies.

I am mainly just thinking about how hard it is to pack around a newborn all day, every day. I remember how badly my back hurt with Erik and am hoping to retain some sort of back muscle endurance so I’m not in so much pain when I have to pack this baby around.

I’m also thinking about my poor ass. I swear I’m carrying triplets. I have one in the tummy and one in each ass cheek. I’ve never had a big butt, but all those BodyPump squats pumped it up. Now the muscle is sagging, leaving me with a mess. I’m just not used to having a problem with that part of my body since I’m a classic apple shape.

*Note: Kisha she is one of your people–a couponer.