The Queen's Rambles

Everything was going so well I should have known the other shoe would drop.

I have an infection in my belly. I am not sure how it all works, but all I know is I’m in incredible pain. Way, way more pain than I was in even the day of the c-s. I even called the doctor, which is something I never do.

I’m now on antibiotics and have a follow-up appointment next week. She even gave me another bottle of percocet to see me through. I was afraid she would just accuse me of being a drug seeker, but that didn’t happen. Probably because everyone watched the tears stream out of my eyes as I s-l-o-w-l-y made my way back to the office. I could barely move.

I am under strict orders to keep to my bed, keep my feet up and my incision site exposed to air. Not exactly comfortable, but if it will help I will do it. Not that I am going it this moment, but I am going crazy from not writing. I need to write daily. Obviously that hasn’t been happening.

Thankfully my mom is here another week and Mike just started his four week vacation so I am well taken care of. I just feel bad for Erik. He is all about his grandma, but he is also acting out really badly and I know he misses his normal mommy. I’m doing what I can to alleviate that, but it isn’t much.

When my mom first got here she thought he was the sweetest, most angelic child. Ha! She has seen the light and is getting pretty annoyed with him. He is testing every limit she sets for him and is trying to get the better of her at every opportunity. She doesn’t have the patience to deal with him, but she’s doing her best. I want her to read 1-2-3 Magic, but she “doesn’t need to read a book to know how to deal with children.” I will never understand that attitude. People have done research and have good ideas! Read a few books! You might learn something.

At least she has been ok with me nursing Elsa. She hated it when I would nurse Erik but I guess she’s over that.

Elsa still doesn’t look like an Elsa to me. Elsa should have blonde hair and pale skin. My baby has dark hair and a darker complexion. She is B@dorek through and through and will never give off that Scandinavian Elsa vibe. I want to re-name her Jolene but Mike thinks I am totally nuts and won’t even entertain the idea. I can’t say I blame him, but seriously. She is not an Elsa.

I guess I better go and climb back in bed. I hope the antibiotics kick this thing out of the park sooner rather than later. I can’t believe how shitty I feel. My c-s recovery was so easy with Erik. I never imagined this would happen even though I knew it was a possibility.

I think I better go get my tubes tied right away. I can’t go through another recovery like this. Elsa is such a sweet, easy going baby that I can see why people look at their baby and go “awwwwww, we should have another one!” I never understood that with Erik. I looked at him and though “never, never, never again.” Not that I didn’t love him, but he was a lot of hard work.