The Queen's Rambles

I’ve been sleepy for the past 24 hours. I was so sleepy that I fell asleep while putting Erik to bed, which never happens. Usually I’m wired up, ready to run out of the room at the first possible chance to go do really important things like stare at the TV or eat ice cream. Or stare at the TV while eating ice cream.

Have I mentioned I’m addicted to ice cream sodas? Vanilla ice cream, chocolate syrup, and a bit of club soda in a coffee cup. I haven’t been to Dairy Queen in months. Who needs DQ when I can be my own barista? Only I suppose the word would be soda jerk, but who wants to be called a jerk?

My mom left yesterday so we’re all recovering–Erik is sad, Mike is energetic and I’m . . . sleepy. It was so nice having her here. She was the perfect buffer between me and Erik, plus she did most of the laundry and a lot of the cleaning. I could go places without worrying about dragging the baby along, or I could send her on errands. I’ve been watching Sister Wives so I decided I needed a sister wife or two (one to earn money, one to help around the house), but I wouldn’t want to share Mike. I guess that’s why normal people have nannies. But how do I get a nanny that will work outside the home and give me all her money? There must be a word other than slavery.

At least we had a very nice distraction today. Brenda is back in town to help Bethany prepare for her soon-to-arrive baby girl so we went down to have some fun. You get three kids together and you often have a pouting mess, but thankfully all the kids played well together most of the time. When they didn’t we told them to cheer up and be good and that was about all the intervention they needed. Bethany took some great photos HERE (updated link that should work). I didn’t even take my camera in because I knew I could count on Brenda and Bethany to take a ton of pictures and they would turn out better than any that I would take. Photography is definitely not my game.

Brenda and I lamented the loss of my grandmother. She was such a great character. Sure, she was a bitter old woman, but the stories wrote themselves. I need more blog fodder like that (and obviously I loved my grandma for more than just blog fodder). I have a few people in my life that I could turn into characters and you’d all be begging for more ridiculous stories, but I’ve learned my lesson. No more writing less than flattering things about friends and acquaintances unless I lock the posts. Being a conscientious friend has taken a major toll on my blogging. Remember all the stories of my Swedish friend, Annica? She probably would have killed me dead if she ever read the things I wrote about her. I had no idea what the hell I was doing.

I guess I could write about my family, but I get tired of them. They have gone from wacky into “someone call the police.” Since there are children involved it is no fun at all. My mom wants custody of those kids so badly and she needs custody, but it’s not as easy as all that. I’d like to share a wise piece of advice with all you ladies out there. I hope to Fred none of my readers need this advice, but here goes: if you have an emergency bag packed for your children and you’ve told your children where to hide/what to do if your spouse goes crazy and starts hurting you or the kids GET A DIVORCE! RUN! ESCAPE! That’s not normal. Normal people don’t have an escape plan. A fire escape plan? Yes. Spouse escape plan? That’s just crazy. If you need one you are in a bad relationship and it’s not going to get any better. I’ve been a kid with an escape bag. Don’t do that to your kids. Go to the crisis center. Call the police. Call your mom. Whatever. Leave and never go back.

I just wish I could tell my sister the same thing and have her understand and follow through. I fear her children and her husband need an escape plan to get away from her as much as she needs an escape plan to get away from him.

I need to go to bed and stop dwelling. Thinking of those kids makes my heart hurt.