That Boy
Erik as vampire. He wanted to know what vampires do, so I told him “suck your blood.” Three minutes later, he had marker blood all over his face. I’m so glad they make washable markers these days.
As you may or may not know, Erik hates bathing. He hates water. He hates warmth. He no longer takes a bath, preferring a quick shower. I hate this b/c he wants barely luke-warm water and it freezes me as I’m helping wash him.
Today is picture day so he absolutely had to have a bath last night. He’s usually pretty grimy and gross and dressed in an oversized t-shirt advertising various kinds of cartoon violence. Not the vision I had of my sweet, precious pumpkin when he was younger and had no opinions about his looks.
I was trying to chivvy him up the stairs and made the comment “Let’s get this party started!”
Whoo-boy. WRONG thing to say. “Mommy, it is not a party. A party is fun. There is nothing fun about taking a bath or going to bed. IT IS NOT A PARTY!!!!!!!!”
Ok, so it’s not a party.
When we finally get up the stairs he tells me that instead of taking a bath, we’re going to take pictures of his penis and mail them to his aunt (my sister).
What the bleepity-bleeping what?
I guess it’s a good thing for my sister that she lives a country away and her only contact with him is through me. I know he made it up out of his own little deranged mind and she didn’t request nakky pics of my kid. My sister has a lot of flaws and has made a lot of questionable life choice, but child pornographer isn’t one of them.
I kind of laughed it off when it happened, but then I was up in middle of the night with my mind churning (as usual, since I don’t take sleeping pills any more). Where did he get the idea? I am sure he could have came up with it himself. He has a healthy appreciation of his boy parts and he likes taking pictures for various family members. But what if one of his friends was telling him about doing that for an aunt or uncle? I think I’ll question him today. It was probably nothing, but I am slightly disturbed.
Oh, speaking of things that are slightly disturbing?
Remember when I posted that checklist about sensory seeking children and Erik could check off almost all the items? I didn’t feel there was a problem, but I don’t want to be the type to stick my head in the sand and ignore something that might need help so I’ve been doing a ton of research. Turns out that checklist was more like a secondary checklist. He doesn’t have anything marked off on the main checklist. I wasn’t worried or even concerned but it’s just good to know I don’t even have to think about it. One of the main things OT would address is an inherent clumsiness since the body parts aren’t talking to each other. Erik is about the least clumsy child I know. He is my golden boy–beautiful, athletic, confident. Clumsy doesn’t even enter the picture.
We went to a birthday party with relay races this weekend and I felt sorry for the girl who was paired up with Erik. She was a little older than him and pretty overweight. I was sure she would be eating his dust because that boy is FAST. I’ve rarely seen anyone beat him in a race.
Holy cow, was I ever wrong. That girl could MOVE. She made Erik look like he was standing still. I was impressed.
Ok, my time is done. Erik is finally out of bed and demanding food.
*The disturbing thing being that maybe Erik had a sensory disorder, not that the girl was fast. I re-read it and it sounded weird and abrupt. Probably because I lost my train of thought.