The Queen's Rambles

My sister has been calling and harassing for the past few days, wanting to make sure we go to church today. Ha. That’s really going to happen. She’s concerned for our souls because Jesus is returning in 2012 and the Earth is going to fall apart. She saw it in a John Cusack movie.

Funny, I don’t recall any Jesus talk in 2012. Does she really not get the total hypocrisy of telling us to go to church when she lies, steals, drinks, drugs, sleeps around and doesn’t take care of her own children? “What do you mean? I just have to ask Jesus to forgive me. He loves me.” She goes to a Baptist church. They must do things a lot differently than the Wesleyan church I grew up in. Not saying Baptists would approve of her lifestyle, but I don’t believe they have quite the emphasis on guilt and holy living that the Wesleyans have. Honestly, I have no idea about any of the Baptist theology and don’t really care to be schooled on it. Suffice it to say, I don’t think my sister understands or really even cares about their theology.

We had a pretty nice Easter around here except for the not nice parts. Erik loved hunting eggs and was pretty upset that Elsa wouldn’t find any because it “wasn’t fair.” He is such a good big brother–so loving and always watching out for her.

The Easter bunny made too much noise last night and woke Elsa up around 10 pm. She was awake! Wide, wide AWAKE! And ready to have fun! She discovered her belly and kept rubbing it and trying to pinch it off, then she started playing telephone and was creeping us out. We’d say “Hello” and she’d say “heh-wo.” We’d say “How are you?” and it sounded like she said “How are you” as clear as day. Same with “I love you.” Then she came over, handed me her pretend phone and started having a complete hissy fit until I handed her the camera. We’ve taught Erik to trade things with her to keep her from getting upset so I guess she’s learned her lesson well. I forget that 1 year olds aren’t little, lumps of flesh. They know and do and want and plan.

After lunch I was going to take a nap with Elsa. She started choking in her sleep, then all of a sudden she started puking and puking and puking. She even puked in my mouth. Gag. Ugh.

I hope I never repeat that.

Mike has been working his butt off this weekend and even managed to get up our new-to-us trampoline. He put the last tie in place and Erik was just about to start bouncing when the heavens opened and rain started coming down in buckets. I later found out that we had a tornado warning right then as well, but we didn’t have a radio, TV, or computer on at the time. Guess it’s a good thing we didn’t get blown away.

We took my mom to Bucca de Beppo yesterday and Erik discovered a little statue of David. He kept going over and looking under the grape leaf and fondling what he found. It was just a weeeeeee bit embarrassing. He won’t quit grabbing his own private parts either. I told him I’m going to cut it off if he doesn’t quit but he just looked at me like I was stupid. “You won’t do that mommy. I’d die.” I was breaking the all important “say what you mean and mean what you say” rule. I need to think of something else. Time outs, hand slaps, growling. . . it doesn’t work. My mom said to get him a jock strap. Do they make jock straps for 5 year olds?

I guess that’s all I’ve got. My stupid WordPress is not e-mailing me my comments and I have no idea what to do about it. I can reply to the comments, but I think it just publishes them on my site and not in an e-mail to the person. Does anyone really go back and check the comments? I know I don’t.