Ten Days!
I’ve officially been to the gym 10 times in November! Ten is the magic number because it means my daycare pass was worth it. You either pay $2/hour or buy a monthly pass for $20.
When Erik was little, I was there six times a week. It has been much harder making that happen since Elsa came along. First she hated it, then she was always sick, and now I just have a lot of scheduling issues. I can’t figure out how to schedule in the classes I really want to take, so I’ve just been doing cardio. I need a new plan.
But ten times! I think this means that Elsa’s immune system is finally up to par and we are getting in our groove with our schedule. She hasn’t been sick in weeks (knock on wood).
Of course, a big part of our scheduling problem is that I have friends. When Erik was a baby I didn’t have friends. I was timid.
Can you imagine? I can’t imagine. I was painfully shy. Looking back, I was just ridiculous. What was I so afraid of? Why did I care so much what people thought about me? Yes, people form opinions based on appearance, but people also believe what you tell them about yourself. If you tell them you are fun and confident and worthy by acting fun and confident and worthy they will believe it.
My 2008 resolution to “Be Vivacious” has changed my life in so many ways. I can talk to just about anybody about just about anything these days. I am first to strike up a conversation. I schmooze. I really didn’t know I had schmoozing in me, but I do. Since becoming MOMS Club president, I have to be extra-super friendly and chatty to everyone who comes along. I guess it is not a requirement, but people certainly prefer a friendly president over an aloof president, and we live in a pretty small town as far as the stay-at-home-mom population goes. I decided that I wasn’t going to strike up conversations or be social in Elsa’s gym class. I need a break from being so damned vivacious. Who knew I’d ever get to the point that I was so successful with my plan to make friends that I could take a break from it?
The other piece of gym time scheduling has to do with Elsa’s sleeping habits. After having a kid who absolutely refused to sleep; a kid who screamed, cried, kicked, fussed, and had a meltdown for at least an hour before every single nap and every single bed time; a kid who could seemingly live on no sleep at all; well, let’s just say Elsa is different. A kid who melts down if they aren’t given the opportunity to nap a few hours after waking up? What strange creature is this? She’s been getting up at 7 and wanting to nap from 11-3. Maybe I need to up her dosage of iron.
But I should be posting about new things, right? Don’t I post about this every day? Ugh. Boring.
Warning: just another mom post. Except the gym post. I’m sure it excites you greatly to hear that I’ve been running on the elliptical for ten days.
The only exciting part has been the book I’m reading–Deathless by Catherynne Valente. Wow. I knew it would be strange, but I was also hoping it would be wonderful. I picked it out for our book club this month and I’m not sure what I’m going to say about it. It is strange. It has some amazingly beautiful bits of writing. The plot is completely baffling. Basically the author is either totally into S&M or had a really, really abusive marriage. Or both.
I know that some people are really into the whole pain is pleasure thing, but I don’t get it. I hate pain. I don’t like to get a paper cut, a stubbed toe, or a too-hard love pat. I simply don’t understand the appeal of causing pain or wanting physical pain in a relationship. I want to be treasured and cherished. I want to be coddled. I do not want to be harmed in any way. I don’t have the mental capability of understanding why having someone try to exert control over me through pain would be a fun thing. I know it’s a real kink that some people enjoy, but it eludes comprehension for me. Book club will be interesting this month (if anyone actually read the book).
Let’s talk about something that doesn’t involve bloody sex scenes.
Things have been good on the Erik front this week. I don’t know why, but he’s been behaving exceptionally well the past several days. Perhaps because I put his video game in a time out for a day and he doesn’t want that to happen again? Is he really old enough to start understanding consequences and making good choices that aren’t totally in the moment? I hope so.
He’s been doing his homework without whining, getting ready for school without whining, and just generally being a nice kid. It’s such a pleasure to be around him when we can have a normal conversation and work together without having a screaming match. I hate yelling at my kids. I feel like I’m abusing him, but then I realize he is giving as good as he gets so I don’t think he’s all that intimidated by me. I always swore I would never yell at my kids, but hot damn. Sometimes I swear he likes it. Any attention is good attention? Hmmmmm. . . .
Elsa continues to grow and develop at an astounding rate. I want to capture her sweetness and light and somehow hold it for all eternity, but I know I will love her more and more as she grows older and begins to reveal her true self to us.
Then she’ll be a teenager and I’ll need that captured sweetness and light.
It’s so fun to hear her trying out new words every day and watching her face as she makes connections between cause and effect. She’s no longer a little lump of dough. She’s a real person with real thoughts and real demands. She marches down to the bus stop, waits patiently, then waves “bye” the second the bus pulls away and marches right back home. She’s very determined and has no time to waste on talking with other people at the bus stop.
She loves going to the gym now and will even give the ladies hugs when she leaves. Her hugs are full force affairs that about knock you down if you don’t brace for them. It’s no so much a hug, as a throw-down. Today she demanded a “hus” from me, so I picked her up and whirled her around. Then she wanted a kiss, so I puckered up.
Oh god, people.
She stuck her graham cracker coated tongue into my mouth.
My mouth was closed at the time, but she used so much force and it was such a surprise that I didn’t stand a chance.
(This is where I stop writing for you and start writing for her virtual baby book).
I don’t ever want to forget the utter and complete joy she takes from rolling around on the floor. That sounds silly, but how else can I explain it? She’s exploring her body and its limits and loves feeling the feel of rolling. She could roll around all day, except then she’d miss out on playing peek-a-boo (the kind where she jumps out of something) or singing Itsy-Bitsy Spider (her very favorite song).
I love that she is talking so much. I don’t remember Erik talking until he turned 2, so I’m always taken aback when she starts blabbing away and I understand so much of it and am able to respond to her requests. Three most requested items: Puppy (meaning sign language DVD), pretzels and shoes. She’s doing a ton of sign language, like Erik did. He preferred bird and shoes. She likes go, shoes, milk and monkey.
She also likes to talk about “boo-boos” and let every woman she meets know that they have boo-boos and that daddy doesn’t have boo-boos. As most people guess, she means boobs. Being a mother is nothing if not an exercise in humility.
I really need to make some movies of her, I think. Not to show you guys, but just to have. I have a few of Erik up on YouTube and I get a kick out of watching them every once in a while. I barely get out my camera these days because I am so unhappy with my photog skills. I need to get over myself and get pictures, even if they are blurry. She’ll only be this small once. I’m never going to have another toddler, so I need to make this one count.