The Queen's Rambles

I should have made a bet with someone, but I didn’t have anyone to bet with. You see, my friend and I made play date plans for my house. I knew it would never happen. She is a neat freak to beat all neat freaks and she hates coming to my house. I assume it is because she’s a neat freak. I don’t really know. She’s never actually said she hates coming her, but we’ve known each other for almost two years and I think she’s been to my house three times. I’ve been to her house almost weekly.

I am wondering if I should get a little paranoid or offended, but then I figure it is just as well because I don’t have to clean up or be freaked out by the state of my house.

Anyway, we had a board meeting together this morning and were confirming plans. Erik was there, so she started asking Erik what he wanted to do–go to our house, go to her house, or go to the open gym. He LOVES LOVES LOVES going to her house, which she knows.

Surprisingly, he picked going to the open gym.

It was fine and I was relieved, but I just think it’s funny that I knew she wouldn’t be coming over here. Normally if I know I’m going to have company I do some cleaning–major or minor depending on the person and state of the house. Guess how much cleaning I did to get ready for her visit? Nothing. I was very confident we wouldn’t see her despite our plans.

I know I’m not a stellar housekeeper, but I don’t think the house is that bad. I guess no one ever does, do they?

The kids had fun at the open gym and I didn’t have to clean my house, so it was a win all around. There was one bad batch of siblings, including the meanest five year old girl I’ve ever met. She even made Erik cry, which is not easy. Mama Bear was not happy!

We ended up watching this little girl and whenever she would go near our boys we would go over and hover, giving disapproving looks. At first we had to speak to her and tell her to leave the boys alone, but eventually a mean look was all it took to drive her away. Her mother? Completely oblivious. I was a little worried that she would try to kick our asses. She was a big lady and I think she could have taken us. My friend is really small, but wiry. I’m pretty useless in a pregnant state. Wouldn’t you love to see me on the news for some stupid fight at a kid place?

Remember the stew I was talking about last night? Apparently it didn’t sit well with Erik either, though he didn’t eat a single bite of it.

He came into my room around 7 this morning, complaining that he was really tired because the stew kept him awake all night. I seriously doubt he was awake all night. I’ve mentioned the kid can’t be left alone, right? No way in hell would he lay in his room all night. If he was awake he would be in our room.

He kept going on and on and on and on about the stew. The stew! The stew was bad! The stew!

I told him that Mike took all the stew to work for his lunch (a small lie) so it wasn’t even in the house. He didn’t believe me, so we had to call Mike at work and I had to try to telepathically communicate that he should tell Erik that he had all the stew and he was going to eat all the stew.

Mike is not so good with the childhood lies and exaggerations.

I tell Erik all kinds of crazy stuff all the time, most of which he doesn’t believe. I just like to see his reaction and I believe it is important for kids to get used to being teased and know how to react so they don’t end up getting really hurt later on.

Mike is not so good at this.

In fact, Mike says I’m a liar.

I think I’m hurt.

What’s wrong with trying to convince your kid that you’re a penguin? Especially when they don’t believe it and are enjoying arguing with you?

Ah well. I chalk it up to a difference in our natal homes.

Speaking of differences, I cracked myself up yesterday.

Erik was sitting in the backseat saying “Copenhagen” over and over. I had a mini-internal-freak-out and casually asked him how he knew about Copenhagen. Duh, mom, we just visited there. Duh, indeed! I hear the word Copenhagen and instantly think of Skoal’s chief competitor in the smokeless tobacco department.