The Queen's Rambles

Did I mention that we got Erik some hermit crabs? He is completely terrified of insects. We had a fly in the bathroom the other night and he flat out refused to go in there. So he wanted crabs? Which look like gigantic, disgusting spiders? Makes no sense. He’s even got Elsa scared of insects. When she sees one she yells “Bider, bider, bider!” Then we say “nooooo, that’s just an ant.” Then she eats it.

It’s too bad the crabs are nocturnal. They sleep all day and I guess they skitter around at night. If you turn the lights on they immediately go into hiding. Elsa loves them even more than Erik. She screams “Bannit, bannit! CWABS! CWABS!” We’ve finally figured out that bannit means “come on.” Yesterday I told her bannit instead of come on, and she came right to me.

Anyway, she loves to sit and watch them, but gets very frustrated when they don’t move.

Erik loves them so much that he wrote a poem for them. It was not a good poem because he’s six years old, but it was pretty good for a six year old. It had a pleasant symmetry.

I could not believe how little the gal at PetSmart knew about crabs and their needs. Erik had to school her. We decided not to buy them there since they were all half dead. The PetCo guy knew a whole lot more and the crabs were a lot happier and healthier.

Segue: Cake

I want to get Elsa a Curious George cake for her birthday. I have been spoiled by an awesome grocery store bakery in my hometown. I bought my wedding cake from the grocery store. That’s how good they were. So many yummy fillings! Trained decorators! So very different from the grocery stores in our area. Safeway has decent cake, but horrible decorators. Everything that comes out of their bakery looks like it belongs on Cake Wrecks. Giant has nasty cake. Costco has good cake but no Curious George.

There’s a Harris Teeter not too far away, so I will check them out. I know they have awesome cake, but I am not sure about their decorations. There’s a Wegman’s a half hour away but I don’t want to drive that far for a cake. I have no idea if they are any good or not or if they would have Curious George.

I tried to find a cake decorator on Craigslist, but the only one I came up with had the most awful photo gallery.

Hear that scrreeeeeech sound, like a needle on a record? Do you kids remember that sound? Party is canceled. Cake is not that important. I have surgery April 11th. I think I’ll just go to Harris Teeter this afternoon and see what they have. I would still like to get a Curious George cake, but at this point I am feeling overwhelmed.

It wasn’t going to be much of a party. Elsa doesn’t even like people, really. I just sent an e-mail to one set of family friends and asked if they wanted to come over for cake this weekend. We’ll see what they say. Everyone else is out of town for spring break/Easter.

I’m glad I got in for surgery so quickly. Living in this much pain sucks ass. My mom will be here so that helps a lot too. Unfortunately Mike has a huge presentation that day and will probably not be able to come and sit with me. I think it will be fine for my mom to bring Elsa to the waiting room. Elsa is so very, very easy (except when she’s acting 2 and throwing a major tantrum. Problem with having an Amazon child: she’s almost too big and strong to man handle). I think if we get some of those Color Wonder drawing sets and take a dolly she’ll be fine. Erik will be in school and I can ask a neighbor to collect him from the bus. It just sucks that my husband’s job is so family un-friendly.

I need to load some books onto my Kindle in case I end up in the hospital overnight. I just finished Digging to America by Anne Tyler. I’ve never read anything by her before, but now I must have more! Totally not my type of book (just regular ol’ contemporary fiction. Not a speck of magic or murder to be had), but it was our book club book. I was not even going to read it, but then I started it and couldn’t put it down. It is mainly about an older Iranian woman adjusting to life as an immigrant, even after being in America for 20+ years. Her son adopts a daughter from Korea and ends up becoming friends with an American couple that also adopted a daughter. It shows how the families blend their Iranian-ness and American-ness.

Ok, I should get all these people dressed and in the car. We’ll head out to Harris Teeter and see what they can do for us.